real talk: change and fear

Overcome Your Fears - Pommel Lane

I'm going to start this off by saying I knew 2014 was going to be a year of changes. I had big plans as I thought about the blank slate, if you will, that comes with a new year. What I didn't know was how big these changes would really be.

If you are following me on Twitter, Instagram or have looked at any of the new site you may know that I will be launching an Etsy store in August. I am beyond excited to get the site finalized and share with you all of the services and products that will be available. While this is the biggest news coming this summer, it isn't the only news and I'm looking forward to finally sharing the rest with you in a couple weeks, so stay tuned. (Yea, I kind of lead you on there, sorry ;D)

In the course of blogging during the last 3 years some of you have heard tales of my cake business and seen me venture back into that passion as a hobby; others of you have seen me start offering custom blog designs. That's 2 businesses I've started in 5 years. I would be remiss if I didn't finally smack myself upside the head and truly give being a small business owner and entrepreneur a shot. So, that's what I'm working on. I'm thrilled. It's challenging. I can't wait.

But I'm terrified.

Yup, there it is in print - right on the screen, right on this page. Would you believe me if I said otherwise? Probably not. I know I wouldn't.

I've gone through a lot of emotions while getting ready to start this business. I am truly thrilled. I keep an idea notebook with me at all times so when I think of random ideas I can jot them down. Just being able to write them down with the notion they could one day become a product, service or integral part of my brand lights the biggest fire inside of me. Then there is the doubt, the insecurity and worry that this could all be a big mistake. I've been in the corporate world almost 7 years, working for almost 10 years (what?! I still feel 18 inside! I couldn't be that long already... am I right?), and there is a societal norm that corporate and government jobs are secure and safe. If we are being honest, they really aren't anymore. I've been lucky, I've survived every re-org and major layoff at every company I've worked for. Not everyone is. I've seen a team of 7 have to compete with not only each other but external applicants as well to refill 5 roles on their newly structured team. I try to remind myself of instances like this when I start worrying about the uncertainty of a small business. There are pros and cons to every situation. I've just become more comfortable with one set of cons versus the other. It's time to change that. It's time to try a new way of thinking and being.

I'm far more prepared going into this than I was either time before. I'm not going to just "start off and see where it goes". I'm going to make it official. I'm going to invest some of my savings. I'm going to give myself a blank slate and a chance to prove to myself that I can make money doing something I love. I'm also going to try not to explode OR implode from the anxiety and pressure I know I will inevitably put on myself. The goal is to not put that on myself in the first place because - wellness - but I'm not perfect and there is a whole set of personal goals to achieve along side the business ones. With that said though, I won't let worry stop me. I want it too much. I'M HUNGRY. I'm ready. I don't think I was ready before, it was just preparing me for this moment in my life.

I hope that I can look back on this, no matter what happens, down the road and see what I've learned and remember how I felt at the beginning of this journey. Life is about change, it is the only constant and everybody has got to start somewhere - so here I am, at the start.

I really wanted to carry this reminder with me so I made it a lock screen background to share with you all.

iPhone 4/4S  -  iPhone 5/5S  - Galaxy S5

Leave me a note on Twitter, Instagram or right here in the comments and let me know what you are going to remember to overcome!